God’s Vagabond Child..

February 19, 2009
2:06PM

Unless you are given any idea on what the insides of a coconut looks like, you will imagine something else. On the outside, it is green and seemingly useless. Like a rock or something. But when you crack it open, you’ll learn that inside, you can find some tasty and healthy juice and coco meat. Then you’ll realize that things aren’t what they always seem to be.

It goes both ways, this metaphorical shit that I’ve spontaneously created. You won’t know really (really, because you can always assume that you know.) what’s the inside of someone else’s coconut shell unless you ‘crack’ it open. Likewise, anyone couldn’t just accurately decipher you using Freudian slips or psychoanalysis or some projective tests. You will have to ‘crack’ open your coco ball for them, so that they’ll know. However, we live in a world where fear enables you to self-preserve or to self-destruct. Sometimes, you’d rather not travel a hundred miles to find better pastures, you stay in what little meadow that you currently have. I myself heard myself one time saying, “Mas mayo pa mapatay ko cancer na wala ko nabal-an kesa mabal-an ko bago mapatay” (I’d rather die of cancer without knowing that I had it than know it before I actually die.) It’s cowardice at its refined form, I admit. Knowing that you have cancer is the greener pasture since, at least,you’ll have a chance to cure yourself rather than wait for the unknown sickness to consume you.

I actually don’t really get my point. And that’s nice since you’ve wasted time reading this. I dunno. Given the circumstances, I think that ‘what is’ is better than the riot that will be created by an ‘I’m hoping that’. Coconuts don’t break that easily and two equally hard coconuts is far worse.

They fall.

Yes.

But extra effort is needed to open it and let the juice and meat save a life.

I’ll just drink water for now.

2:29PM

How To Save A Life :
Step one you say we need to talk
He walks you say sit down it’s just a talk
He smiles politely back at you
You stare politely right on through
Some sort of window to your right
As he goes left and you stay right
Between the lines of fear and blame
You begin to wonder why you came

CHORUS:
Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life

Let him know that you know best
Cause after all you do know best
Try to slip past his defense
Without granting innocence
Lay down a list of what is wrong
The things you’ve told him all along
And pray to God he hears you
And pray to God he hears you

As he begins to raise his voice
You lower yours and grant him one last choice
Drive until you lose the road
Or break with the ones you’ve followed
He will do one of two things
He will admit to everything
Or he’ll say he’s just not the same
And you’ll begin to wonder why you came
Feb. 4, 2009

01:19AM

It’s perfectly fair to be misunderstood once in a while since you also misunderstand others sometimes.

This thought came to me after I’ve read The Fray’s “How to save a Life” for the nth time now. I just woke up by the way and after I’ve tinkered with my already overcharged phone, I read the paper - where the lyrics was printed - that is tucked below my pillow. Specifically, the line “Pray to God he hears you.. Pray to God he hears you..” triggered the thought. Sometimes, the things we say, the way we behave and our simple impulsive acts come from the things that we try to contain, tame, suppress - whatever term you like - that tend to overflow. It can be deliberate or unconscious (unconscious but later, if you are very introspective, you’ll realize the point of the way you acted). And here usually comes the misunderstanding.

Like suicide and self-mutilation, it is supposed to be a “cry for help” (which means papansin, pabatyag, pa epal, etc. if you are a skeptic), a cue that something is bothering that person. However, as was mentioned, these are often misunderstood or sometimes you simply don’t know how to react. It is quite rare for someone to actually penetrate the glass globe that surrounds you and will try to “hear” you. There will be few who’ll “know” what to do during these times because it will require courage. Courage.

If no one will be able to do so, its ok. There are times that you haven’t (unintentionally )or didn’t (intentionally) do your part too.

.  .  .  .  .  .

I was thinking, I may be talking to myself, huh? I don’t know. Maybe it’s both ways. “I’m talking to you”. I’m reading it, so I’m talking to myself. Now that you’re the one reading it, I’m talking to you..

Weird, huh?
_______________________________________________

As I understand “How to save a life”, its a confrontation between two friends that’ve gone awry and ended in ‘parting of ways’ (i sooo love this phrase.. :D). Imagine two people who’ve been friends for some time now. The first line tells of the effort of one of them to ask the other one to have a “sit down it’s just a talk” session (see lyrics). However, the tension is palpable. Both can’t look each other in the face. (he goes left and you stay right).

I discussed the second stanza after the chorus in the first part of this post.

In the third stanza, the one who didn’t initiate the confrontation is already heated and the other one concedes and asks him to either continue and eventually lose the friendship that they have (”Drive until you lose the road”) or do something about it (Break with the ones you’ve followed). The statement might’ve hit something and the angry one calms down and will either admit his mistakes (”He will admit to everything”) or reason out that he simply isn’t the same person that the other one have known before. (”He’ll say he’s just not the same”)

The song ends up in regret. “I WOULD HAVE STAYED UP WITH YOU ALL NIGHT, Had I known, how to save a life.” The person would’ve stayed if only he knew how to confront the situation. But he didn’t know how to. Thus, the first line of the chorus..

My thoughts? Again, it all boils down to misunderstanding. If only we could read each other’s minds, many relationships might’ve lasted a life-time (here and in.. heaven? who knows?) Patience can remedy this though. But we only have enough. No more, no less. And here lies the conflict.

You try to elaborate that for me.

ALTASHHETH™

2:57AM