Storyteller
January 9, 2009
9:32 AM
Storyteller. The term used by General Sahib in the movie adaptation of the novel “The Kite Runner” by Khaled Hosseini. I can’t say I’m a writer because I haven’t written any stories yet. I just make up stories in my head, but I can’t write them..yet.
I hate romanticized endings. I love sad endings with good and strong resolutions. The type of endings wherein a main character sits in a bench somewhere, winds blowing and thoughts wandering near the end of the story. I often create mental stories with someone dying in the end. Maybe it reflects my strong preconceived notion that, once everything is already irreversible, there you’ll find out that you should’ve done something. However, these sad endings often have flashbacks of happy memories, so, my stories, though tragic, still have a tinge of brightness in it.
The point? Though in reality, I often look at the bright side of things - enduring whatever in the hopes that in the end, it’ll be all right - I am a pessimist by nature as observed in the projections that I make in my stories. When I’m happy with someone, I often have short episodes of feelings of emptiness somewhere in between. Maybe it’s because of the things that had happened in the past. Happy moments that always end in a parting of ways. Somewhere within me, I know that every happy moment with anyone, anyone, won’t last forever. New people come. Things happen. Distance. It kills even the shiniest of hopes.
People will say, “Stop thinking about it, just treasure those moments.” How could I treasure those moments when the knowledge - and therefore the pain - of knowing that it won’t happen again, overpowers the need to preserve things in a luminous view. And, I’m me. I’m not them. I don’t know how to fool myslelf using sheer optimism.
So I’ll be here. Thinking of stories that I’ll end the way that I want it to. I only wish that Life is like that, you end it the way you want to. But no, no matter what you do, you can never control the things that are happening and will be happening. I concede.
Altashheth™
Jan. 9, 2009
10:06 AM
